Office Dares

[cockerkneeboy]

Office Dares

One-Point Dares

1. Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.

2. To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.

3. Leave your fly open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, 'Sorry, I really prefer it this way'.

4. Walk sideways to the photocopier.

5. While going in an elevator, gasp dramatically each time the doors open.

6. When in elevator with one other person, tap them on the shoulder and pretend it wasn't you.

7. Finish all your sentences with 'In accordance with the prophecy...'

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. Interrupt your conversation with someone by giving a huge dejected sigh.

10. Use your highlighter pen on the computer screen.

Three-Point Dares

1. Say to your boss, 'I like your style', wink, and shoot him with double-barreled fingers.

2. Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle.

3. Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

4. Every time you get an email, shout ''email''.

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has got over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. Keep hole punching your finger. Each time you do, shout, 'dagnamit, it's happened again!'. Then do it again.

7. Introduce yourself to a new colleague as 'the office bicycle'. Then wink and pout.

8. Call I.T. helpdesk and tell them that you can't seem to access any pornography web sites.

Five-Point Dares

1. At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).

2. Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.

3. For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as 'Dave'.

4. Announce to everyone in a meeting that you 'really have to go do a number two'.

5. When you've picked up a call, before speaking finish off some fake conversation with the words, ''she can abort it for all I care''.

6. After every sentence, say 'Mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent. As in: 'The report's on your desk, Mon.' Keep this up for one hour.

7. In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, 'Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!'

8. At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, 'As God is my witness,I'll never go hungry again!'

9. Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: 'Do you hear that?' 'What?' 'Never mind, it's gone now.'

10. Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuit; smash each biscuit with your fist.

11. During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.

12. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

13. Ask people what ###### they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

14. Sign or p.p. all letters with your initials and a swastika.

15. Dry hump the photocopier. When someone spots you, stop and cough embarrassingly, then lean in to the machine and whisper loudly, 'I'll see you tonight'.

Go on give it a go :D

[Guest Postie Pidge]

Brilliant!

[r_and_l]

Have you got any pub dares that those of us that dont work in an office can try cockerkneeboy

apart from saying rude things to the biggest bloke in there :lol:

[cockerkneeboy]

r_and_l, Sorry no pub dares but i did find some pub games if it helps and they have to be worth a look.

Sponge Ball Square Pints

What's needed

1 sponge ball that is SLIGHTLY smaller than the opening on a pint glass

Aim

You simply take it in turns to try and bounce the sponge ball into your mates pint before he does it to you

Rules

You take it in turns

The ball must be bounced off the table and not thrown directly in

The glasses must not be moved unless being drunk from

Results

Hilarious guffaws of laughter as your mates pint splashes everywhere and then half his pint is drunk up by the sponge absorbing it. Also secondary fun of throwing round a lager soaked sponge ball

The Spotting Game

What's needed

At least one friend who is in on the joke

Aim

You and your friend pick a point on the ceiling of the pub and then at intervals look at this point and say things along the lines of... "There it is again" and "It's there now" as if pretending there is a bird or something trapped in the pub. Hopefully peoples curiousity will make them take note and join in searching for this imaginery bird with their own sly glances and looks

Results

Should provide a good few laughs as people get sucked into your twisted little games

Bogies

What's needed

Willing participants and a busy and drunken pub

Aim

The aim of the game is to be hailed as King/Queen of shouting loudly and without embarrassment in public places

Rules

A player starts off by saying the word "Bogies", the next player then also says "Bogies" but must say it a little bit louder than the previous person. This continues around all players until slowly players refuse to shout any louder and drop out. The winner is the one left shouting

Variations

To make it a bit more interesting you can always change the word from "Bogies" to something less polite of your choice and there is the oppurtunity in this game to add drinking forfits to

Results

If being played properly and going to maximum volume then should cause huge amounts of laughter as after every shout the whole pub turns to find the loony creating the din. Chance of also being asked by the staff to "keep it down" although should only act to spur you on

Pub Snatch

What's needed

A lack of morals

Aim

The aim is simple. You go into a pub and when you leave that pub you have to have stolen something from there. Now we're not talking robbing the place. Something like an ashtray or maybe the blackball from a pool table. Apparently this game is better if you can make the items you're trying to steal interesting and challenging

Results

Very possibly a night in the cells after a game of this although will offer up many oppurtunities to kill yourself laughing in the morning, assuming that you aint in a cell

How Many Pints?

What's needed

A pub full of people

Aim

You simply sit with a friend and decide how many pints it would take for you to shag different people. For example if the person is particularly ugly then you might say "20 pints" or if very attractive you may say "None"

Results

This is a game that is played more all through the night while your out and can be used to keep really drunk people interested in talking rather than just dribbling on themselves. Interesting to see the number of pints it takes to shag uglier people go down after those pints are being drunk though, this game is a teller of the future. WARNING! This game does have the capacity to see you ending up in bed with a very ugly person, be careful

The Breast Man

What's needed

Breasts

Aim

To make blokes staring at your bristols get all blushy and to make fools of the leering ones. To do this you single out a man who's been looking at your norks and you time how long he looks then when he is about to turn his gaze from your melons you stick them out nice and proud into bazooka action. This should hopefully cause a double take making his intentions obvious to everyone causing the humiliation

Rules

The humiliation is worth more if you can do it to a man who is with a girl or a man who is married

Results

Womens liberation makes a bold statement and man gets one in the eye, also a damn good laugh

Fag Pack Flip

what's needed

Cigarette packet (empty or full)

More than one willing player

Aim

To be a top notch fag pack flipping genius and avoid the consequences of bad flipping

Rules

You simply take a cigarette pack put it over the edge of the table and flip it into the air, you then wait for it to land. If the pack should land on it's face then you must drink 2 fingers worth of your drink. If the pack should land on it's side however then the pack passes to the next person for thier go but the 2 fingers you should ahve drunk if it had landed on it's front are also passed. When the second person flips if it should then land on it's front they would have to drink 4 fingers but again if it lands on it's side or bottom then the pack is passed along with the current total of fingers which would now be 4 . If the third person then flipped and it landed on it's front then the drink would be 6 fingers and so on. Once someone drinks though the game starts from 2 fingers again

Results

Gets you slaughtered

Word Association

What's needed

A good vocabulary and a few friends sitting in a circle

Aim

To match words with your mates and avoid saying stupid things

Rules

Everyone knows how to play word association, well this is exactly the same except for a few little changes. When a person starts they must start off by saying "To my left" or "To my right" to set the direction, if it is not said before the game starts then the person must drink. "T" words are change direction so if someone says a "T" word then it goes back to whoever said the word before them, if the person after answers then they must drink because it wasn't their turn, if neither answer then the person who was before drinks because they failed to realise the "T" changing direction. "S" words are instant drink words, if anyone says an "S" word they must drink. The final rule is the simple, if everyone doesn't think the words being connected are right then the person drinks.

Variations

This game can have many variations, I think I'll leave this one to your imagainations.

Results

Very drunk, very stupid and also gets very loud. The longer this game goes on the more insane the answers are.

Beat The Barman

What's needed

A bar, barman and some friends to play

Aim

To be a super fast drinker

Rules

The first player goes to the bar and orders a drink, a shot or pint or whatever is decided although pints is preferable. Once you have your drink you pay the barman with more money than is needed. If the drink was £1.50 then try to give the barman a £10 or £20 note. The aim now is to drink that drink before the barman returns with the change, if you manage this then another drink is ordered and the process is repeated until a specified amount of money or number of drinks has been spent/consumed. If the challenge is completed then that person will go through to the final. Repeat for other players until you have all people who managed and then repeat for final until someone wins. Failure to drink or finish drink, fainting, being chucked out and vomiting will all cause you to lose this game. Best to point out that this game is probably best played in quieter pubs and at the start of an evening.

Variations

As you can imagine there are many variations you could put on this yourself, knock yourself out!

Results

Very possibly hospital in this case

Three Legged Bar Crawl

What's needed

Friends in multiples of two preferably, at least four people

Aim

To show your friends you could compete in the olympics

Rules

As you may have guessed already, this is pretty straight forward. Simply get yourself a partner and tie your ankles together. Together with your competitors set a route that you will all follow and a pub that will be the finishing line. Once all decided simply get to the first pub as quickly as possible and get inside. You must enter every pub on the list and drink at least one drink, even toilet breaks must be taken in your partnership. The winners are the first team to get to the finish pub and order a drink.

Results

At least one broken leg more than likely

Cursed Two Pence

What's needed

A two pence coin and a few people

Aim

To show how rich you are by throwing your money round

Rules

Someone starts the game by holding the "Cursed Two Pence" the aim being at some point to put the two pence into someone else's pint or drink. If you are caught attempting to put the two pence in you must finish your own drink. If you succeed then the player who finds the two pence in their drink must finish that drink and then deposit the two pence into someone else's pint and so on.

Variations

You can also try "Double Jeopardy" which is the same game but with two coins

Results

A two pence piece shortage

[Anita]

Bogies

What's needed

Willing participants and a busy and drunken pub

Aim

The aim of the game is to be hailed as King/Queen of shouting loudly and without embarrassment in public places

Rules

A player starts off by saying the word "Bogies", the next player then also says "Bogies" but must say it a little bit louder than the previous person. This continues around all players until slowly players refuse to shout any louder and drop out. The winner is the one left shouting

Variations

To make it a bit more interesting you can always change the word from "Bogies" to something less polite of your choice and there is the oppurtunity in this game to add drinking forfits to

Results

If being played properly and going to maximum volume then should cause huge amounts of laughter as after every shout the whole pub turns to find the loony creating the din. Chance of also being asked by the staff to "keep it down" although should only act to spur you on

Great game i've never lost at it yet, not saying that i've got a big mouth just i like shouting Bogies :drink:

[Guest Ronin]

For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as 'Dave'.

After every sentence, say 'Mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent. As in: 'The report's on your desk, Mon.' Keep this up for one hour.

In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, 'Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!'

Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: 'Do you hear that?' 'What?' 'Never mind, it's gone now.'

As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

Ask people what ###### they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

I get the feeling there's going to be a lot of weird shenanigans going on at matches all over the County tomorrow :clapper:

[cockerkneeboy]

Anita, I had a feeling you might be good at that one lol

Ronin, Hey dont blame me for any of it but it would be great if some people tried them lol :D

[eddy junior]

21

Start with a group of people in a circle. First person says "to my left 1" or "to my right 1". Then the second person say 2 then the next 3 etc. But if one person says 6 7 for example then it changes direction. so the person that said 5 has to say 8. If it breaks down the person who cocked up has to have 2 fingers (can be extended. When u finally reach 21 a random number is picked by the person who said it and they have to replace it with a work. For example if they say 5 is flag then it would be 1, 2, 3, 4, flag, 6, 7...etc. This is really funny once you get 3 or 4 words into it.

G*ypose master

U elect a ###### pose master. They have to make a g*y pose within a group of mates. The last one to pose has to drink then they are the G*y pose master.

Question master

elect a question master. they have to ask a question and if an answer is given to them then the person who gave it drinks and the question master continues his role. but if the person tells the question master to "f***" off" then they become the question master and the former question master drinks.