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My son has just come back from tonight's game a little bit bemused. His team were winning by a considerable margin,when his manager was alerted to the fact he had 2 unused subs. They were ushered over and told to choose 'heads or tails', the winner to get to go on. Obviously, he lost. Now, a lad that had started was taken off for the substitution, he then goes back on after 10 mins and my lad doesn't get 1 min.  Is there any wonder that loyalty to a club is in decline, he is only 16 and is keen,and he is already thinking of packing in altogether. It's gutting to see your son come home really upset .

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Rob I know we had this conversation about your lad  and it hurts like hell when you can't  do anything to help ,  if as a Dad and ex player yourself there must be plenty of teams that would give your lad a fair crack ,  tossing a coin to play is taking the urine no wonder your lad is upset , and I would be seething . when you see games called off as    teams can't raise a side and your lad can't get a kick  it is not right  , how are youngsters going to learn the adult game when they are treated like this ?   Tell him to keep his chin up  there are plenty of Managers around who will give him a chance , good luck in the future  .

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1 minute ago, ballsax said:

My opinion, 16 or 60, I wouldn't want to play for a manager who, tactically or otherwise, makes a change based on the toss of a coin!

I agree, it's difficult to stay out of it. He may not be the best player or the quickest, but he is keen and he loves the game. As for not liking the manager,  he has been taught to be respectful to his elders. I hope he finds a club that will accept him for the player he is!

5 minutes ago, stevieb said:

Rob I know we had this conversation about your lad  and it hurts like hell when you can't  do anything to help ,  if as a Dad and ex player yourself there must be plenty of teams that would give your lad a fair crack ,  tossing a coin to play is taking the urine no wonder your lad is upset , and I would be seething . when you see games called off as    teams can't raise a side and your lad can't get a kick  it is not right  , how are youngsters going to learn the adult game when they are treated like this ?   Tell him to keep his chin up  there are plenty of Managers around who will give him a chance , good luck in the future  .

I keep telling him most weeks to keep a positive outlook on things, but tonight has really broken his spirit. We are rather upset with it all, I get a bit of humour, but tossing a coin and not getting any playing time is ridiculous. Thanks for the words of encouragement Steve. 

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Just now, dogfish said:

Was it the St Buryan St Just match? With rolling subs why not bring them both on?

I'd rather not say!

 

Just now, Titus Bramble said:

Where abouts are you based? I know Storm FC are always looking to improve the squad and we have several young players that have been given a chance and taken it!

PZ,  I appreciate the offer, if we were a little closer I'd bring him up for a look. Thanks tho ☺

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He deserves better than that. If I were his dad, I'd suggest him not turning up or playing for that side again. 

To flip a coin in a game where rolling subs are active is an absolute farce; the manager should be embarrassed with himself. Absolutely pathetic. I'd understand if it was a cup final and your team is winning 2-1 and your lad was a striker, but the manager wants to defend the lead.... But this is ridiculous.

 

Plenty of clubs are crying out for players. If he's on the bench for a division three side, get him down to division four or five for regular game time and a chance to gain some experience 

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I manage in division 5 and lucky to have a squad of 16 to take to every game. In every one of those games each player has had at least 20 minutes irrelevant of the score even if were losing. Everybody gets a chance each week.  There will be plenty of teams who would give him game time.

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3 minutes ago, Dange'rous said:

He deserves better than that. If I were his dad, I'd suggest him not turning up or playing for that side again. 

To flip a coin in a game where rolling subs are active is an absolute farce; the manager should be embarrassed with himself. Absolutely pathetic. I'd understand if it was a cup final and your team is winning 2-1 and your lad was a striker, but the manager wants to defend the lead.... But this is ridiculous.

 

Plenty of clubs are crying out for players. If he's on the bench for a division three side, get him down to division four or five for regular game time and a chance to gain some experience 

I have tried to be as supportive as I can during the season,but tonight was really hard to take. In my opinion he has the ability to play in that league, he is just lacking match fitness, which you can only get from playing. 

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As far as I'm concerned you should never decide how a player comes on through the toss of a coin. That's very poor. And I feel sorry for your lad, especially at such a young age. I wouldn't want to play for a club either that does something like that, or be associated with them.

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Bring him over Gwinear on Saturday and we can have a chat, I am more than happy for him to get involved with the club next year and I give every player a chance whether they like it or not. 

No player should be treated like that and I don't care what the other side of the story is, it's rolling subs and that was introduced to get everyone involved, no player should go home without getting a game. 

Alan Williams 

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19 minutes ago, Darin Morse said:

There's two sides to every story.

Two sides to every coin aswell.... Clearly 

 

 

 

Definitely get him to play under a different manager next season. The decision to base game time on the toss of a coin is absurd. 

The best way you can support him is to help him to understand that what has happened this evening isn't normal and it's not right. At a young age, he has years and years of football ahead of him so I wouldn't worry too much now; the seasons all but over. Good pre season with a good team and mangager will sort the fitness out..

 

edited due to a severely dyslexic iPad...

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14 minutes ago, Dange'rous said:

Totally appreciate the kind words and messages, I think he will just get this season out of the way and start afresh next year (hopefully). As for the 2 sides to every story, your quite right, but it's been a similar trait all season with travelling all the way to the ground only to be told he isn't even a sub, so it's not like it's a new scenario.

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Should never have that many subs in the first place when you know you can only make 5. It's certainly not something I would do. I'd rather stay at home than turn up at a game and not come on because it's been decided by the toss of a coin. How bad must this young lad feel, bad enough. Just hope he doesn't give up.

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3 minutes ago, Wingersshins said:

Buryan reserves had six subs tonight. Guess the manager thought this was the fairest way to make the final substitution. What would you do?

You cant have 6 subs!...you have to give the name to the ref before the game of 5 subs

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4 minutes ago, dobbie said:

You cant have 6 subs!...you have to give the name to the ref before the game of 5 subs

Exactly what I was about to say. You can use five from five, not five from six! 

One too many? Sort the admin out prior to the game. Don't waste the kids time!

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16 minutes ago, Darin Morse said:

There's two sides to every story.

There always two sides but a young lad just wants to play  , and as a father I can understand why he is upset , I know also the lad has caught the bus to games  , so he is willing to travel to play ,   my own son had a similar thing happened to him at youth football  and he walked away and isn't interested at all in the game ,  my daughter was treated unfairly at a young age  with a certain manager she nearly gave up  but persevered at  is still playing  and enjoying it also at the school she works at she coaches a girls team ,  the point is it doesn't take much to put of young players but you try to get them back ,  and it's not always being the best  there are not many world beaters in the Junior leagues I should know I used to play in the old West Penwith ,/ Amor shield  and laterly Mining league  I was not the quickest or best but I bloody enjoyed it .

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Feel your boys pain. Had this done to myself a few years back playing for another club. My brother and I were both on the bench with about half hour to go in a game obviously before roll on roll off subs were introduced and the team had already made two subs. The manager came over to us and said heads or tails and flipped a coin to see who would be going on. I think its a cowards way to not have to say you arent going to play. We were 26 and 27 then. We both left the club at the end of the season and are both still enjoying our football with another club. Your boys still young so plenty of clubs out there struggling for players who would quite happily have your boy on their team. Just needs to find the right one to be appreciated sometimes. I myself have have moved clubs 3 teams all for varying reasons but don't give up all together when it's something he enjoys doing.

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1 hour ago, Roy Keane is GOD!!! said:

My son has just come back from tonight's game a little bit bemused. His team were winning by a considerable margin,when his manager was alerted to the fact he had 2 unused subs. They were ushered over and told to choose 'heads or tails', the winner to get to go on. Obviously, he lost. Now, a lad that had started was taken off for the substitution, he then goes back on after 10 mins and my lad doesn't get 1 min.  Is there any wonder that loyalty to a club is in decline, he is only 16 and is keen,and he is already thinking of packing in altogether. It's gutting to see your son come home really upset .

Don't give up. Your time will come.

 

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1 hour ago, Wingersshins said:

Buryan reserves had six subs tonight. Guess the manager thought this was the fairest way to make the final substitution. What would you do?

Teams are only allowed to name 5 subs, so if a manager knows he has the luxury of 6 why not be upfront with the player who isn't likely to feature. Subs still have to be named prior to kick off so maybe you need to check with the referee as to who was named beforehand to find out if your youngster was even in the frame. Check the League Full Time website in a couple of days to see the submitted team sheet. Penzance are always happy to give youngsters a look.

 

 

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Thanks to all for taking the time to read, and reply to this thread. Since the post I've been contacted by the club with sincere apologies to both myself and my boy. It's very heart warming to read the messages of support, and I think it may just keep my lad enthused enough to make a spirited go of it again next season,where ever that may be. Once again, a big thank you to ALL.

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Good for the club to apologise to your lad and yourself hope he can find a club for next season and gets a fair crack ,  that is all you can hope for , it's hard being a parent when your kids are involved in sport , perhaps next season he can enjoy his football and be left with great memories when he reaches our age , perhaps the manager involved will also learn for the future how to handle the situation better .

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4 hours ago, Roy Keane is GOD!!! said:

Thanks to all for taking the time to read, and reply to this thread. Since the post I've been contacted by the club with sincere apologies to both myself and my boy. It's very heart warming to read the messages of support, and I think it may just keep my lad enthused enough to make a spirited go of it again next season,where ever that may be. Once again, a big thank you to ALL.

Good to hear,hope he finds a decent manager to play for pre season,failing that send him on a refs course at least he'd get paid n still enjoy his footy but in a different way !!

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Titans have pretty much got our squad for next season but he will be more than welcome to join us for pre-season. The sessions are usually very good and will certainly help :)

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Stupid to do it from the toss of a coin, it would surely demoralise your boy. He is still young and has a good 20 years of football ahead of him. He should change clubs, plenty out there struggling for committed players and he sounds committed. He is obviously playing under a bad manager who has his favourites by the sounds of it. We are a team based in st Austell and would be looking for fresh blood next season so message me if your boy fancies coming along. 

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Glad the club have approached you both to rectify the situation and really hope your lad stays involved in the game. I do agree with everyone here that a manager making a decision on the toss of a coin and not for footballing reasons is poor and lacks bottle.

My advice to your boy would be stick with it, when I first started in adult football as a young lad I spent a long time on the bench, running the line, sometimes never even getting on, it was frustrating and I would moan and sulk (like young lads do) and I was certain that I was a better player than a lot of the older players who were getting regular games. It's not a unique story and is a journey that I'm sure many players go on, it's a right of passage.

Don't let modern societies desire to have everything on a plate, right now, affect your lads football. Make sure he knows that every player has to earn his stripes, regardless of how difficult it can be to not be playing much football, even when it doesn't seem fair. In time things fall into place and he will I'm sure have a long career ahead of him,

 

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Yeah make sure he sticks with it.

 

Before I joined Frogpool I had tough experiences at Mawnan and St Day where I would be given very few opportunities due to the large number of players that were in both squads. When I joined Frogpool I was brought on for 20 minutes in my first match, came on at half time in my second match and then in my third match I started and got man of the match.I haven't looked back since and although I had a brief stint at Stithians I could never see myself at another club in Cornwall.


I am sure once he gets into a club that gives him an opportunity he will begin to love football once again. These things are difficult and often involve patience. If he loves the game enough then it will come :)

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If the post wasn't put on here there wouldn't have been an apology. Because no one would have known about it so the manager and club are trying to cover their backs. Don't congratulate them on apologising because they shouldn't have treated the lad in that way in the first place. Has the manager been on an FA courses course and learnt or read about respect in the game ? Or anyone in the club ? 

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